Picked up keys to new place. Did I mention before that the counters have a boomarang design. BADASS.
Living in transition is weird. Taking down one part of your life and building another. The biggest thing haunting me is.... The baby box. The box with little golden books from when I was a little girl. A berry hat like the one I bought my neice. A pathetic box. Such a weird place to be when you are growing inside. Figuring out what you want in life. Figuring out what you had planned was not really .... I dont know how to finish that sentence.
Before this trip I had never eaten at a resturant alone, seen a movie... anything. As cheesey as it sounds I feel like I gained a huge part of me. Being in the old place, you cant help but face the reality of everything. You really did this. You really did this because everything in you pushed you too. Starting to want to eat again. Wonder if I should keep the old pants. That were the skinny pants...
My doctor told me today to let myself live out this whole time. That I dont need to evaluate it, just live it. This made no sense to me. Isn't that what talking about your life is? Evaluating it? Or looking at it and finding meaning. I wonder if you reader are thinking. What is with this crazy bitch? She is all over the board. Well then.. stop reading